Chapter 35
The moonlight grew faint, and the road before her was gradually swallowed by darkness.
The road leading out seemed far longer than the road she had taken to come here. Xu Yizhuo could not remember how long she had already been walking, but she never slowed her steps. At a certain moment, she suddenly realized she was walking completely in darkness. The familiar buildings on both sides of the bluestone path had already vanished. When she looked up, there was only a colorless, chaotic expanse. The illusion in the shape of Qingping Town had disappeared little by little without her noticing.
Aside from the firm thought of leaving the illusion, Xu Yizhuo could not help thinking about what meaning Jun Yu had within this illusion of the Lidan River. She thought for a long time, and thought that perhaps Jun Yu, to her, was the only connection between this world and reality. When she had first arrived here, there had been no one familiar to her in this place—except Jun Yu.
Perhaps this was the reason she had seen Jun Yu in the final illusion.
Later on, Xu Yizhuo felt as though she had lost the ability to think. Only her legs were still mechanically stepping forward. Her mind was muddled, and she was in a state of such extreme exhaustion that she felt she would fall asleep in the very next moment.
The darkness before her eyes grew sticky and thick. Xu Yizhuo kept walking forward, but some resistance made her feel as if she had walked for ages without taking more than a few steps.
Pressure from all directions tried to push her back.
Xu Yizhuo gritted her teeth and forcefully took a large step forward. It was as if the sound of something breaking rang by her ear, and Xu Yizhuo’s thoughts suddenly became clear.
She opened her eyes.
Xu Yizhuo woke up on the cold deck.
Just like some people would forget the contents of a dream the instant they woke up, Xu Yizhuo’s mind was completely blank when she first woke. After sitting up and letting the river wind blow over her for a long while, she gradually recalled the contents of the illusion.
Immediately afterward, she finally noticed Mister Yu crouching to the side and yawning. For a moment, she still did not react.
Mister Yu looked so sleepy that he seemed like he could fall to the ground and sleep at any time. Listlessly, he said, “I saw that you were quite quiet after entering the illusion, not crying or making a fuss, so I just put you on the deck first.”
There was even a bit of surprise in his tone. Xu Yizhuo asked in confusion, “Do other people react very intensely?”
“Of course. I’ve seen no fewer than eight people try to jump into the river.” Mister Yu pointed beyond the ship’s side. “Those lotuses of yours did hold back quite a few.”
Only then did Xu Yizhuo realize that the river surface had changed completely from before she entered the illusion. The lotuses that had seemed to cover the Lidan River had already vanished without a trace.
“Those lotuses were supported by your spiritual power. Not long after you entered the illusion, they disappeared.” Mister Yu stared into Xu Yizhuo’s eyes. “A Qi Refining cultivator’s spiritual power reserves could never sustain the appearance of that many lotuses at once, let alone without your spiritual power being exhausted. Let me think… You must be carrying some magic artifact, and its grade definitely isn’t low. Is it a spirit artifact, or an immortal artifact…”
Mister Yu smiled. “Surely it couldn’t be a divine artifact, right?”
There was not the slightest emotion in those inorganic eyes that did not belong to a living person. There was not even a hint of a smile. The hairs on Xu Yizhuo’s arms stood on end.
The pressure around Mister Yu suddenly vanished without a trace.
“Just joking.” Mister Yu said slowly, “I’m only someone who sails a ship. I don’t pry into guests’ privacy.”
He stood up from the ground and pretended to pound his legs, which clearly would not get tired from squatting at all. Then he said to Xu Yizhuo, “It is late at night. Although there is nothing much to do on the ship, Miss Xu should still quickly return to your room and rest.”
After saying this, Mister Yu slowly walked toward the crew’s quarters first.
Xu Yizhuo sat where she was and watched for quite a while. Only after Mister Yu’s back completely vanished from her sight did she get up and head toward the cabin. The night was deep. It was probably already past midnight, but this night was destined not to be peaceful. Besides Pingzhou Shipyard’s small ship, countless ships were sailing in the same direction as it. These ships were brightly lit, and even from so far away, Xu Yizhuo could vaguely hear voices coming through the thick fog. Clearly, things were far from calm.
And who knew how many ships had already been sunk by the jiaoren during the earlier chaos, sinking toward the unknown bottom of the Lidan River, toward the Yellow Springs that might be connected to it.
Xu Yizhuo’s gaze darkened, and she left the deck.
When she returned to the cabin, she happened to run into Lin He coming out of Fang Yue’s room. Xu Yizhuo was surprised to discover that Lin He actually had a collapsed, irritable expression. After seeing Xu Yizhuo, Lin He’s eyes lit up, and she grabbed Xu Yizhuo’s arm hard. Her grip was so strong it was practically like she was grabbing lifesaving straw.
Xu Yizhuo sucked in a breath from the pain. Lin He hurriedly loosened her grip a little, but still held on lightly.
“You know how to coax children, right?” Lin He looked at her expectantly.
Xu Yizhuo: “…What gave you that illusion?”
“I don’t care, I don’t care. Anyway, you’re definitely better than me.” Lin He had the expression of someone smashing a broken pot. “That kid cried until my head hurt. Go in and help me coax him!”
Fang Yue?
Xu Yizhuo asked, “He still hasn’t come out of the illusion?”
“He came out long ago. After he came out, he kept crying and sobbing. The more I scolded him, the louder he cried. Damn it, how can a man cry this much?!” Lin He squeezed her fist, and the cracking sounds of her knuckles made Xu Yizhuo’s heart jump. She kept feeling as if Lin He was thinking about storming into the room with her fists in the very next second and beating someone up.
“He’s still a child, isn’t he?” Xu Yizhuo was practically speechless at Lin He’s way of doing things. “Why are you being so fierce to him… Forget it, forget it. Move aside, I’ll try to talk to him.”
Lin He hurriedly made way. Before Xu Yizhuo pushed the door open and went in, Lin He added from behind, “You don’t have to coax him much. As long as he stops crying, it’s fine.”
Before Xu Yizhuo even pushed open the door, she could already hear Fang Yue’s suppressed crying inside the room.
She entered the room and found Fang Yue curled up at the foot of the bed, clutching the corner of the blanket while crying. He looked like only a tiny little bundle. Outside the room, Lin He was peeking in. Xu Yizhuo conveniently shut the door, blocking Lin He’s line of sight.
When Fang Yue realized someone had entered, he lifted his head and glanced over. His eyes were already red and swollen beyond recognition.
Xu Yizhuo felt Lin He had not described it quite right. At least in her eyes, Fang Yue was already trying hard not to cry. It was just that he could not hold it back, and tears kept falling from his eyes. Because he had cried too fiercely earlier, he still could not stop choking back sobs now. No matter how much he tried to suppress them, faint crying sounds still escaped.
Seeing Xu Yizhuo, Fang Yue moved his hand, wanting to lift the blanket and cover himself with it.
“Feeling embarrassed?” Xu Yizhuo said as she walked to the bed and sat down.
Fang Yue stopped moving, but the blanket had already covered half his face. His muffled voice came from behind it. “I’m sorry… I can’t help crying.”
“It’s fine to cry once in a while. You’re still a child,” Xu Yizhuo said. “Don’t listen to what Lin He says. Anyone can cry when they’re sad.”
Fang Yue’s attention seemed to land entirely on the first half of the sentence. “I’m not a child anymore.”
Every child liked to emphasize that they were not a child.
Xu Yizhuo curved her eyes and did not speak.
She took a book from the golden hairpin and slowly read. For a while, the only sounds in the room were Fang Yue’s faint sobs and the intermittent sound of pages turning. Xu Yizhuo did not know how to coax children, and before coming in, she had not thought of any comforting words to say. Sometimes, when people were sad, they did not need others to keep explaining things in their ears. As long as someone quietly stayed by their side, the sad person would gradually adjust on their own.
Xu Yizhuo read three or four pages before Fang Yue suddenly said, “Mother also told me before that if I’m sad, it’s fine to cry.”
Xu Yizhuo responded, “Mm.”
“Everyone else says boys can’t cry. Only Mother lets me cry and says that crying will make me feel better. I already suffer so many grievances in daily life, so I shouldn’t bury the bitterness in my heart too.” Fang Yue said softly, “In that illusion, I heard Mother say those words to me again.”
“The moment I saw Mother, I wanted to stay by her side forever, protect her, and be filial to her. I didn’t want to leave for even a moment.”
Xu Yizhuo closed the book. “How did you come out?”
Fang Yue had stayed in the illusion for about as long as she had. Xu Yizhuo’s will was firm, and she had no attachments on the Eastern Continent, so she had left the illusion very quickly. If things were as Fang Yue was saying now, he should not have left the illusion so easily.
Fang Yue pressed his forehead against his knees. The tears that kept falling had soaked the blanket. “I realized that if I stayed in the Fang family, I probably wouldn’t be able to make something of myself in my entire life. So what if I studied hard? The first madam’s father is the prime minister of Dayan, her full-blooded younger sister is a noble consort in the palace, and the third prince born to that noble consort is extremely likely to be made crown prince in the future. Even if I luckily passed the imperial examinations, as long as the first madam hated me for a single day, I would be suppressed by her maternal family for that day. The Fang family would not protect me. How could I alone fight against half the officials led by the prime minister?”
“Perhaps I might wait until an opportunity to turn things around came in the future. But whether that opportunity truly exists, and if it does, when it would appear—who knows?”
Fang Yue tightly clutched the corner of the blanket. “But the chance to go to the Western Continent and seek immortality and the Dao has already been placed before me.”
Xu Yizhuo sighed and gently ruffled the hair on top of Fang Yue’s head.
That touch was too gentle, just like his mother gently stroking the top of his head. Fang Yue could not help falling into a daze.
“When it comes to cultivating immortality, talent matters, and so does one’s will. You already have talent. If your will is firm, you will definitely succeed in cultivation,” Xu Yizhuo encouraged him. “You will definitely be able to protect your mother well.”
“But now,” Xu Yizhuo changed direction, “you need to rest properly first.”
Xu Yizhuo raised her hand and covered his eyes. Fang Yue felt a warm current ease the swelling and pain in his eyes. He could not help following that gentle force and lying down on the bed, slowly closing his eyes.
“Sleep,” Xu Yizhuo said softly.
The breathing of the other person in the room gradually became steady. Xu Yizhuo waited for a long time. Only after confirming that Fang Yue had already fallen deeply asleep did she quietly leave his room.
The moment she stepped out, she let out a breath and leaned tiredly against the door panel. Just now, she had felt that Fang Yue’s swollen eyes must be very uncomfortable, so she tried to mobilize the fire-attribute spiritual energy inside her body. Although there had been no flaw in her voice, Xu Yizhuo knew just how much pressure she had been under.
To her, mobilizing a single thread of spiritual energy was far more difficult than mobilizing a large amount of spiritual power.
Fortunately, nothing had gone wrong.
After recovering for a while, Xu Yizhuo planned to return to her room. Suddenly, she noticed a motionless figure in the dark. After Xu Yizhuo looked over, a pair of eyes also looked back.
Xu Yizhuo froze.
She had not expected Lin He to actually be outside the room. From the looks of it, she had already been waiting for a long time.
“You were here the whole time?” she asked in a lowered voice. The soundproofing between the rooms was not very good, and Xu Yizhuo was worried about waking Fang Yue, who had finally fallen asleep.
Lin He looked away and nodded slightly.
“You shouldn’t have told him he could protect his mother,” Lin He said softly.
Xu Yizhuo froze. “Is it because cultivation takes a very long time? But if Fang Yue works hard enough, it shouldn’t be a problem for him to reach Foundation Establishment in a few decades. At that time, with his cultivation, he would be more than enough to protect his mother on the Eastern Continent.”
Before Foundation Establishment, cultivation did not rely too much on talent. Xu Yizhuo estimated conservatively that in thirty or forty years, Fang Yue should more or less be able to cultivate to Foundation Establishment.
“A few decades is too long.” Lin He tilted her head back slightly and lightly leaned against the wall. “His mother won’t live past three months.”
Xu Yizhuo’s mind suddenly went blank.
“She didn’t dare tell him and begged me to quickly take him away,” Lin He said softly. “She hopes Fang Yue will think she is still living well, that he will have something to hold on to in his heart, and that he will have a little hope for the future.”
“The past of the mortal world is often hard to leave behind. But some things are severed so suddenly, before you even know it.”
Comments 0
You must be logged in to comment.
No comments yet. Be the first!