All for You (Lily Futa ABO) - Chapter 2

The thought of ending her life again had crossed this Lin Yao’s mind more than once. When she couldn’t even operate the cash register properly at her new job, when she was scolded by colleagues and superiors for not being outgoing enough to chat fluently and naturally with customers, when she hated her own incompetence every single time—she several times picked up the kitchen knife and held it against her wrist, only to chicken out again.

First, she feared that the original owner of this body might still come back someday. If she took advantage of the original owner’s absence to steal away her chance at life, wouldn’t that make her a murderer of sorts? Second, the last time she tried to kill herself, not only did she fail to die, but she ended up in an even worse world. What if the next world was even more unimaginable, even more terrifying?

The new job was actually tolerable. Although she couldn’t be as lively and outgoing as the other Lin Yao, providing customers with an excellent shopping experience, she gradually managed to handle the cashier duties. Sometimes she could even answer basic product questions for customers.

But when she was alone at night, an immense sense of loneliness assaulted Lin Yao—this familiar monster, the same as before but even more intense, wrapping around her. Greedily and relentlessly, it devoured her heart, leaving enormous hollows behind without any intention of stopping.

And Lin Yao was astonished: her emptiness already seemed bottomless, yet it could still be devoured further? Could it become even deeper, deeper still? She felt like a dim, flickering oil lamp on the verge of going out at any moment, yet even in that state, this monster born of loneliness could keep drawing energy from her, making her weaker and weaker.

In her previous world, Lin Yao had had two or three friends, but none had ever truly entered her heart.

She needed them, like a drowning person clutching at every straw. Yet if she placed such heavy expectations on her friends, it would only burden them.

Now in another world, the Lin Yao from her original world had very likely died. Would those friends remember her? Miss her? Thinking of this, she let out a deep sigh and sank once again into self-loathing. Someone like me—nobody would need me, nobody would miss me. No one needs me. I have no connection to the world, to anyone…

Even in this regard, the original Lin Yao of this world had done better. Her diaries recorded fun moments with several close friends; it seemed that whenever they were together, it was always happy times, with no excessive expectations. The others also greatly enjoyed her companionship.

Among them, the closest friend—the one she stayed in touch with most—was apparently a Beta woman named Du Jia. They had grown up together in the same orphanage. Later, Du Jia earned a bachelor’s degree and became an ordinary white-collar worker. They had always kept in contact and never drifted apart.

About a week after Lin Yao recovered and started working, she received a message from Du Jia. Du Jia wanted to celebrate her friend’s birthday and suggested the two of them go out to eat. To the current Lin Yao, this friend was essentially a stranger, and she didn’t want anyone to see through that she had been replaced. She originally wanted to refuse. But since it was indeed her birthday too—and having a friend remember her birthday made her genuinely happy—she agreed.

Her birthday in mid-March fell on a weekend this year. Lin Yao arrived at the agreed-upon affordable Japanese restaurant and met her “good friend.” Before going, she deliberately checked Du Jia’s photos on social media to avoid the embarrassment of not recognizing her. The social platforms in this world were quite similar to those in her previous one.

As soon as she entered the restaurant, she saw Du Jia waving at her. From her outfit, it was clear she was someone who paid attention to fashion. Lin Yao sat down, her heart pounding so hard it reached her throat, terrified of being discovered as someone else.

The two ordered a lot of salmon sashimi. They chose this place because the Lin Yao of this world also loved salmon. In fact, Lin Yao herself had little interest in most Japanese dishes; she came here purely because she liked raw salmon. As they started talking, Du Jia complained about troubles at work for a while, then suddenly stared at Lin Yao.

“You seem… different today.”

“Why?” Oh god, she hadn’t even said much yet and she’d already been noticed?

“Because you’re way quieter than usual today. And I feel like you’re acting strange, kind of nervous.”

Sure enough, a friend of many years could spot the difference so easily. Realizing that prolonged contact would inevitably lead to exposure someday, Lin Yao once again used the excuse of personality changes due to amnesia after the concussion.

Du Jia looked worried and scolded her for not telling her about the accident, but almost at the same time, she seemed to breathe a sigh of relief: “I thought you were worried about the mandatory matchmaking conference.”

“What?!” Lin Yao had spent the past week just trying to get used to work and had completely forgotten about it.

“Yeah, starting today, you’re officially 25 years old—you’ve reached the age for mandatory matchmaking. But you know, you’re an Omega who’s never been with anyone and has zero experience in that area. In the past I always told you to find a gentle Alpha to break your virginity or just get together with someone, but you never cared. Now you have to be with strangers, and I’m really worried the other person might be rough with you.” Her friend looked genuinely concerned.

Lin Yao thought quickly. Anyway, she had ten chances to reject, and the conference happened every six months—so five years in total. She could keep dodging it. Maybe by then the original owner would have returned. And if she made decisions for the original owner in her absence—randomly having sex with someone or even bearing a child—that would be deeply unfair to the real Lin Yao. With that in mind, she told Du Jia her plan: reject as many times as possible.

Du Jia’s eyes widened. “Isn’t that just continuing to run away? What happens when you turn thirty and have no choice but to accept? I really understand how hard it is for you as an Omega. I often feel lucky I’m a Beta and don’t have to deal with pheromones or reproduction. But if you keep relying on suppressants long-term, the side effects are serious. And as an Omega, how long can you even keep working part-time jobs? Most Omegas only gain real security in life after bonding with an Alpha.”

Hearing this, Lin Yao thought of this world’s almost feudal social system and felt both angry and helpless. She stayed silent. She didn’t want to think about the future; she only hoped she could disappear from here soon and that the original owner could return quickly.

Seeing her friend didn’t want to dwell on the topic, Du Jia tactfully changed the subject—though as a close friend, her next comment was quite savage: “We haven’t seen each other in a while, right? I don’t know if it’s because your body is just recovering, but your skin looks worse, and you didn’t even bother to dress up when you went out.”

Lin Yao had nothing to say. After arriving in this world, she had indeed noticed this body was in better condition than her previous one—probably because the original owner had regular habits and a much more positive attitude. The skin was better, the figure a little slimmer, the overall energy brighter. But ever since she took over, she had started overthinking at night again, frequently sinking into negative moods, and hadn’t eaten properly or healthily. In such a short time, she was already dragging the original owner down.

Soon the food arrived. They ate their fill, then chatted about some gossip from this world, which helped Lin Yao understand her surroundings better and lifted her mood a little.

When they were about to part, Du Jia earnestly told Lin Yao to let her know if she ever had any troubles. Lin Yao felt deeply moved—she considered herself extremely lucky to have such a friend even in a parallel world. At the same time, she reminded herself once again: she must not become a burden to this new friend, and she had to properly maintain the relationships the original owner already had.