A Self-Cultivation of a Stand-in [Transmigration GL] - Chapter 14

Hua Luoyue had once faced the exact same choice.

Her mother had been bedridden for a long time before falling into a coma. The doctors said the hope of her waking up was bleak. After several months and countless hints from the medical staff, Hua Luoyue finally whispered a soft, “Okay.”

Others called her calm and rational, but in truth, she simply could not afford such prolonged medical expenses. If she had insisted on going her own way, she would have dragged herself into hell without ever actually bringing her mother back to life.

She had already exhausted every effort.

She had abandoned her dreams, taken a leave of absence from school, and stepped into the entertainment industry, allowing herself to be at the mercy of a management company for several years. The reason was simple: money in the entertainment industry came much faster than working a regular job. It also helped that she had a beautiful face that had been praised since she was a child.

However, a beautiful girl without a background was never truly in control of her own fate in that chaotic circle. The money she earned was a mere drop in the bucket compared to the medical bills, and a mountain of debt weighed so heavily on her that she could barely breathe.

The only reason she didn’t sink into depravity and rot in that world was her mother’s repeated instructions before she fell ill; she didn’t want to become the kind of person her mother would despise.

So, in the end, she was forced to let her mother go.

After ridding herself of those mountain-like burdens, Hua Luoyue worked desperately to pay off her debts, save up for the contract termination fees and tuition, and eventually circled back to campus to start over from scratch.

In the eyes of her old fans and many passersby, Hua Luoyue’s life was an inspiring legend. She eventually became a successful person in the eyes of the public, glamorous and bright, as if she had never known a shadow.

After leaving the industry, she rarely thought about her parents. Most of the time, she was so busy she had no time to think, and she deliberately chose only to look forward. Aside from some occupational ailments common to high-intensity work, her mindset was positive and healthy. She had no trouble interacting with others, suffered from no terminal or chronic illnesses, and had a bright future ahead of her.

Transmigration was an unfortunate accident in her life, but it was also a unique opportunity that was hard to categorize as purely good or bad.

In her past life, she had never encountered a “philanthropist” like Yu Zhezhi—someone who didn’t demand her body, didn’t do anything illegal, had no expectations, and generously threw money at her to solve all her worries. Naturally, she hadn’t had the chance or the luxury to make such a choice then.

From this perspective, she was grateful to Yu Zhezhi.

Even if the woman in the ward, barely sustained by machines, was not her biological mother. It was at least a small consolation for the original host. At the very least, it meant she didn’t have to be like her past self, carrying the heavy burden of having personally pushed her mother into the abyss of death.

Hua Luoyue set down the bouquet in the ward, standing a short distance from the bed, quietly watching the sleeping woman. After a while, she said nothing, slowly turned, and walked out of the room.

There was no one outside the ward. The hallway was visible from end to end, illuminated only by a stark white light. Hua Luoyue could hear her own footsteps. When she reached the elevator, she paused and looked back.

She suddenly remembered that when her mother—devoid of all vital signs—was wheeled away in her past life, she had stood just like this. She had looked back, and there was nothing.

She didn’t cry then. It was just as if an invisible weight had settled on her, urging her to move her feet and walk forward, one step at a time.

With a ding, the elevator doors opened. She snapped back to reality and gave a self-deprecating smile. Having transmigrated and become younger, it seemed her mindset had become a bit too youthful as well.

She tidied her hair, which had been messed up by the wind, in the elevator mirror. She curled her lips, finally revealing her usual faint smile.

The elevator went straight to the first floor. As soon as she walked out, she ran into Cai Xinyue. Cai Xinyue was looking at her toes, pacing back and forth in the lobby.

Hua Luoyue paused for a second before walking up to her. “Xinyue…”

Cai Xinyue seemed startled, her eyes rounding as she looked up. She patted her chest and whispered, “You scared me to death.”

“What are you doing here?” Hua Luoyue asked. “Are you feeling unwell?”

“No…” Cai Xinyue shook her head, looking hesitant. She reached for the book in her arms and handed it over. “You left your book behind. I was passing by, so I brought it to you.”

Hua Luoyue looked at the book, then at her. She didn’t point out that she had originally intended to leave the book at school to return to the library the next day. At this hour, the library’s return desk was already closed.

“Thank you…” Hua Luoyue took the book and put it in her bag, thinking she would just bring it back tomorrow.

“Um…” Cai Xinyue hesitated repeatedly before finally asking softly, “How is your mom?”

“The same as always,” Hua Luoyue replied. She checked the time and gestured for Cai Xinyue to head out. “The buses back to school are almost stopping. Let’s go wait at the station.”

As they walked toward the station, Cai Xinyue spent a long time thinking about what “the same as always” meant. She had never asked for details about Hua Luoyue’s family before.

“The doctor says it’s unlikely she’ll ever wake up, but she isn’t technically dead either,” Hua Luoyue said slowly after they left the hospital gates. “She’s still breathing, her heart is still beating, and the machines show she’s alive. Maybe… maybe one day a miracle will happen, and she’ll open her eyes.”

Even the faintest hope was still hope. It wouldn’t vanish until her mother truly died.

Cai Xinyue instinctively gripped the straps of her backpack. “Then… is that why you got married?”

“I suppose so…” Hua Luoyue said candidly. “I had no way to afford those medical bills, and I want to finish my studies properly. I have other things I want to do. If possible, I don’t want to waste my time on meaningless part-time work.”

Cai Xinyue turned to look at her.

She was different from Hua Luoyue. She had grown up in a well-off family; though they weren’t extremely wealthy, she never had to worry about food or clothes. Even if they faced a serious illness, they had a certain level of financial security. Furthermore, she had parents and an older brother; even if a tragedy struck the family, it wouldn’t be her turn to stand on the front lines. Naturally, she would never need to sacrifice anything.

It was difficult for Cai Xinyue to truly empathize with Hua Luoyue’s struggles, but by putting herself in her shoes, she began to understand.

“I’m sorry…” Cai Xinyue said very softly.

“What?” Hua Luoyue looked over as if she hadn’t heard.

Cai Xinyue shook her head and looked at the road ahead. It wasn’t time for the last bus yet, and the vehicle hadn’t arrived. Since Hua Luoyue was heading in the same direction, the two stood in front of the empty bus stop for a while.

“What is that person like?” Cai Xinyue asked. “Do they… bully you?”

“She’s a good person,” Hua Luoyue smiled. “She doesn’t come around often. She probably just finds it troublesome that people are always talking to her about feelings, so she needs a shield.”

That was only a small part of the reason, but it wasn’t a lie.

Cai Xinyue breathed a slight sigh of relief. She thought the person was someone Hua Luoyue had known for a long time; this excuse made the relationship seem a bit more approachable. It made sense—if they weren’t truly close, why would someone be generous enough to cover all expenses just to have a shield?

“Will it stay like this forever?” Cai Xinyue asked.

“Until the person she truly loves comes back,” Hua Luoyue said casually. “It probably won’t be long.”

According to the plot, it wouldn’t even take the five years in their agreement. At most, in three years, the White Moonlight would return, and she would tactfully exit the stage. By then, she would have already graduated. Three short years were much shorter than the dark times she had experienced in her past life, and the pressure was not even comparable.

The green light at the intersection lit up. An empty bus swayed through the crossroads, slowing down as it pulled up to the curb.

Hua Luoyue pulled her bus card from her pocket. Just before boarding, she suddenly thought of something and turned. “By the way, don’t tell anyone about this.”

Cai Xinyue blinked. “Huh? What?”

“I signed a non-disclosure agreement. I can’t tell the outside world it was for money,” Hua Luoyue said. “If that got out, it would make me look very unprofessional.”

“Then what should I say it was for?” Cai Xinyue asked instinctively.

“Because of love,” Hua Luoyue replied.

“…” Cai Xinyue fell silent for a moment. But then she thought about the “shield” reason again, and suddenly everything seemed to make sense.

“I understand. I won’t tell anyone,” Cai Xinyue promised.

She followed Hua Luoyue onto the bus; no one else boarded behind them. Aside from the driver, the seats were entirely empty. The doors hissed shut, and the bus pulled away toward the next stop. The two held onto the handrails, swaying with the bus as they moved toward the back row.

Before sitting down, Hua Luoyue turned to Cai Xinyue. “Thank you…”

Cai Xinyue finally couldn’t help but ask, “Then why did you tell me?”

“Because you look like someone who can keep a secret?” Hua Luoyue tilted her head and thought about it. Her tone was uncertain and sounded rather perfunctory.

Cai Xinyue couldn’t help but pout. “Are you saying I look a bit stupid?”

“Everyone who knows me knows I’m a poor student with a mother who is nearly dead and a father in prison. But not everyone is willing to understand my struggles. They will only see that I’ve stopped working, that I’m always at the hospital, that I don’t worry about tuition or food anymore, and maybe they’ll even run into me entering high-end complexes or malls… Even if I walked the streets with a megaphone shouting that I married for love, no one would truly believe it in their hearts. Gossip is inevitable. I don’t have the energy, nor is it necessary, to explain things to everyone one by one.”

Hua Luoyue paused, turned to look Cai Xinyue in the eye, and continued, “But I didn’t want you to hear about these things from those rumors.”

Cai Xinyue was stunned.

Hua Luoyue quickly looked away toward the empty street outside. She said very softly, “Keeping a secret like this all alone… it can be very lonely.”

She was grateful to Yu Zhezhi, but that didn’t mean she harbored illusions about her. Yu Zhezhi would never be someone she could confide in or rely on. But not expecting love didn’t mean she didn’t need friendship or family… humans are, by nature, social animals.

And Hua Luoyue was, perhaps, more afraid of loneliness than most.