After She Fell for Me, I Lost My Memory (GL) - Chapter 36

Allergic?

Jian Mu was stunned. She remembered that she had indeed made a carrot dish before. She vaguely recalled that Cen Luo hesitated at the time.

She really did not seem to like carrots.

But at the time, Jian Mu thought that Cen Luo didn’t use her chopsticks because her cooking was bad.

“Carrots are actually very nutritious.”

When she heard this, Cen Luo was silent for a moment and then said, “Actually, I…”

“Was it not tasty?”

“No, no, it was tasty.”

In her memory, Cen Luo never finished the sentence after “actually” to Jian Mu.

But now Jian Mu knew.

Cen Luo was allergic.

But she was only finding out now.

Cen Luo put down her chopsticks and leaned against the back of her chair, looking at the slightly dazed Jian Mu.

It seemed she really didn’t know.

Cen Luo looked away. She reached out and pushed the bowl and chopsticks away from her, and took the photo album, which she had only looked at one page of, to the front of her dining table.

Under Jian Mu’s gaze, she started flipping through the pages.

Her gaze was calm, devoid of any other emotion.

Only when she reached the end did Cen Luo look up and smile at Jian Mu: “It feels like I’ve looked through your photo album.”

Jian Mu said nothing.

“I took all these pictures of you. So what about you? What did you leave for me?”

Cen Luo looked at her with piercing eyes, her expression certain. It seemed she was already sure that Jian Mu couldn’t have left anything important behind.

Asked this, Jian Mu was speechless again.

Ever since Su Nian asked her yesterday if she had ever done anything that moved or delighted Cen Luo, Jian Mu had thought for a long time, but she couldn’t remember anything she had actively done for Cen Luo.

The white sweater she was wearing was bought by Cen Luo when she received her first official paycheck.

Cen Luo also told her that she could only wear it on major holidays.

She only wore it once or twice afterward, and it had been in the closet for a long time without being taken out again.

Cen Luo put the photo album aside, opened the camera, casually looked through it a few times, and then put it down.

“Did I tell you about this camera?”

Rarely, Cen Luo suddenly showed an interest in talking to Jian Mu.

Jian Mu nodded slightly: “You said it was very precious.”

“Perhaps I did tell you, and you forgot.”

If she really liked Jian Mu that much before, it was impossible not to tell her about something like this.

“This was a gift from my grandmother. Later, Xiao Xi wanted it, so I gave it to her.”

Thinking of Cen Xi, Cen Luo paused and chuckled softly: “Later, it came back to me.”

After not hearing Jian Mu’s reply for a long time, Cen Luo looked up and saw Jian Mu’s slightly confused gaze.

“You don’t even know about Xiao Xi?” Cen Luo curved her lips, her smile somewhat sarcastic.

Jian Mu thought for a long time, only vaguely remembering the name “little sister Xiao Xi” that she heard from Qin Ran in high school.

But Cen Luo never told her about her family situation. All she knew was that Cen Luo’s relationship with her parents wasn’t particularly good.

This was something Jian Mu hadn’t paid attention to. She had never proactively tried to understand her family life.

Cen Luo had also never asked her about her family situation.

Cen Luo actually found it a little strange. Since she liked Jian Mu so much, why didn’t she tell her about these things?

After much thought, Cen Luo could only come up with one possibility.

“They all told me that I used to really like you, and I thought so too. Look, all the photos in the camera are of you, I even specially made a photo album for you, and I followed you for ten years.”

“All the plans I made could be changed just because of one of your actions. Seriously, it sounds like I really liked you.”

“But, looking at it now, everyone might have misunderstood. I didn’t even tell you about my most important family members. How can that be love?”

Cen Luo couldn’t remember the past, but she knew she was very stubborn. Perhaps she pursued Jian Mu for so long just to prove that she could?

“Did you ever try to understand me? Did you ever do anything for me?”

Cen Luo asked sincerely. She was genuinely curious if Jian Mu had ever done anything for her, even a small thing.

However, under Cen Luo’s gaze, Jian Mu could only remain silent. She suddenly remembered a message Cen Luo sent her a month ago when she was trapped at work because she didn’t have an umbrella.

Her pressure was heavy during that time. She kept dreaming of vague things, and those things would unconsciously surface when she was with Cen Luo.

It made her want to escape.

Later, she heard someone in the office discussing a psychological clinic that was highly regarded for privacy and professionalism. So, Jian Mu went there when she passed by that afternoon.

Her original intention was just to clearly recall the events of that day.

But she didn’t expect the memories that were awakened to be even more difficult for her to accept than before.

Jian Mu had always known she was different from others. In elementary and junior high school, she had to transfer schools countless times. She never stayed at one school for more than two months.

Every time she transferred to a new school, someone would follow her there shortly after.

When that person transferred, her classmates would no longer be her classmates, and her teachers would no longer be her teachers.

They would all look at her strangely, wary of her.

She moved between different schools for several years, whether in small towns or distant cities far from Yuncheng.

In less than a while, she would see that person sitting next to her, greeting her warmly: “Jian Mu, I found you again. I see someone is being friendly to you. Maybe they don’t know what kind of person you are? Let me do a good deed.”

Later, that person passed away, and she finally had some peace.

After not receiving an answer from Jian Mu for a long time, Cen Luo already had her answer.

Her heart was filled with mixed feelings. After a long silence, Cen Luo finally chuckled: “I found that you really don’t like talking. Do you have some kind of speech impediment?”

Cen Luo wasn’t entirely being sarcastic. This was indeed a point of her confusion.

“I can already imagine my life before. I would frantically try to find topics to chat with you, not get any reply from you, while saying ‘it’s okay,’ and internally trying to figure out your life, thinking of surprises for you on holidays. Of course, maybe what I did was seen as unnecessary by you.”

“I never thought it was unnecessary,” Jian Mu suddenly spoke.

“Then you just took my efforts for granted.” Cen Luo chuckled softly. “Jian Mu, don’t you think this kind of relationship is a failure?”

Her tone carried obvious sarcasm.

Jian Mu met Cen Luo’s gaze. In an instant, she suddenly understood what she had done to Cen Luo.

She took it for granted, but never gave anything in return.

Because she was afraid, she chose to ignore her, but she never stopped taking.

She used the name of “love” to tie her down, but she never gave her anything that belonged to a romantic relationship.

“I know why you asked me to come here. You wanted me to see familiar scenes and familiar things so I would regain my memory and stay by your side.”

Yes, her actions during this time were indeed just to make Cen Luo remember.

Familiar people, familiar places, familiar events. It was all just to make Cen Luo regain her memory.

“Actually, it shouldn’t just be after graduating from university, right? Why was I able to apply to the same university as you when filling out college applications?”

Qin Ran didn’t know, but the sixteen-year-old Cen Luo knew that the university she wanted to attend most was Miancheng University.

She filled out the application at home. If Jian Mu truly didn’t want her to know, how could she have found out?

After a while, Jian Mu finally replied: “I told you.”

Those few days when they were filling out college applications in high school, Jian Mu hadn’t decided which school to apply to until the last day.

All the students informed their homeroom teacher after filling out their applications. In the last few hours, only Jian Mu hadn’t submitted hers.

The homeroom teacher called to urge her, and tagged her in the class group chat. Cen Luo saw it and came to find her, asking her where she applied.

She was silent for a while that day. She knew in her heart that if she didn’t say anything, their college lives would have no intersection in a few hours.

But in the end, she still told her. She just didn’t expect Cen Luo to be very happy after hearing it. Cen Luo said they had a telepathic connection and that she had also applied to Yuncheng University.

“Although I’m quite angry, you’re like the type of person who doesn’t like someone but still strings them along. I think you’re pretty mean. But then again, after following you for so many years, your nature shouldn’t be too bad. Maybe it was just unconscious behavior.”

Cen Luo could only comfort herself this way. More than pursuing someone for ten years, she found it more unacceptable that the person she pursued was fundamentally bad.

“No, I didn’t mean to treat you like that. I just…”

Just what? Cen Luo didn’t want to hear her explanation anymore.

Cen Luo sighed. She picked up the camera again, fumbled with it for a while, and then pressed two buttons on the camera.

The action was too fast for Jian Mu to see what Cen Luo did.

She picked up the photo album again and took out the pictures of the two of them together. There were only a few in total.

In that instant, Jian Mu had an ominous feeling.

Sure enough, the next second, she saw the photo being torn apart in Cen Luo’s hands.

One piece, two pieces, three pieces…

By the time Jian Mu reacted, Cen Luo had already torn two photos.

“Don’t tear them…”

Jian Mu suddenly reached out and grabbed Cen Luo’s wrist, her eyes fixed intently on the photos in Cen Luo’s hand.

The torn photos floated down onto the table and the floor, scattered everywhere.

However, Cen Luo just gently pushed her hand away and took the other two photos from her other hand.

Under Jian Mu’s pleading gaze, Cen Luo tore the two photos into even smaller pieces.

Cen Luo looked at Jian Mu and gently raised her hand. The scattered photo scraps fell in Jian Mu’s line of sight.

The once clean dining room became messy because of these photo scraps.

Cen Luo had only the last photo of them together left in her hand.

In the photo, she was wearing a birthday crown, and in front of her were candles that hadn’t been blown out yet. In the reflection of the candlelight, she was kissing Jian Mu’s cheek.

“Please don’t do this.”

When Cen Luo came back to her senses from looking at the photo, her wrist was already grabbed by Jian Mu. Jian Mu’s other hand was holding the corner of the photo, trying to snatch it from her hand.

In that instant, Cen Luo couldn’t tell what her emotions were. Aside from the first time she saw Jian Mu in the hospital and felt her emotions fluctuate greatly, this was the second time.

“I heard from Xiao Ran that when we got together, I asked you for one request.”

As soon as she spoke, Jian Mu was stunned.

Besides never lying to her, Cen Luo had asked her for one request before.

“I don’t feel secure. Can you promise me one condition?”

“That you will agree to whatever I say.”

If Cen Luo hadn’t reminded her, Jian Mu would have long forgotten about this.

In fact, Cen Luo had never brought this up since they got together.

While Jian Mu was distracted, Cen Luo snatched the photo back. Before Jian Mu could react, she tore the photo into shreds.

“I’ve also cleared all the photos from the camera.”

Jian Mu squatted down, trying to pick up the last photo Cen Luo had torn into pieces. Hearing Cen Luo’s almost cold and heartless words, her body froze.

The ground was littered with torn photo scraps. Cen Luo only glanced at it, then looked at Jian Mu, who was staring blankly at the scattered paper on the floor, and said coldly:

“Although I don’t understand why I spent ten years on you, I respect my past self’s choices, but that’s all it is—just respect. The past ten years are all cleared. I neither love nor hate you now. I hope CEO Jian will stop bothering my life. I’m doing very well without you.”

“That is my request.”

After saying that, Cen Luo smiled faintly at Jian Mu.

After a long silence, Jian Mu’s low question was heard:

“Can I not agree?”

“No.”

“…Mhm.”

Cen Luo never knew that she could say such cold words to someone else.

“It’s getting late. I’m leaving now.”

Cen Luo didn’t wait for Jian Mu’s answer. She picked up the camera from the table. When she got to the door, she looked back and saw Jian Mu still squatting in the same spot.

There were many scattered paper scraps. Jian Mu’s movements were slow. Every frame seemed to be deliberately slowed down.

Jian Mu lowered her head, her fingers touching the scattered photo scraps.

Cen Luo’s gaze paused slightly, then she left the room.

Hearing the distinct sound of the door closing, Jian Mu finally picked up the photo that had been torn into shreds.

Only Jian Mu was left in the dining room. The table full of dishes was particularly glaring at this moment.

In the empty dining room, Jian Mu’s soft murmur finally sounded after a long silence:

“But you said it was two requests.”

When Cen Luo left Jian Mu’s residence, she saw a message from Zhao Zhao sent ten minutes ago, asking her where she was.

They still had an hour until their scheduled time.

Cen Luo: [I’m near Nanyang Yulou.]

Zhao Zhao: [I’m nearby. Should I come pick you up? Wait for me at the main entrance.]

After Cen Luo replied, she put her phone in her pocket.

In less than ten minutes, Zhao Zhao arrived in her eye-catching red sports car.

“Big sister!”

“Cen Luo!”

Zhao Zhao called out twice before Cen Luo came back to her senses.

She got in the car and fastened her seatbelt.

“Big sister, why did you come here?” Zhao Zhao asked, looking straight ahead, pretending to be casual.

“Something came up.”

“But big sister, you don’t look like you were running an errand? Why are you dressed so casually? You dressed better in the hospital.”

Zhao Zhao didn’t press the issue and teased her.

Cen Luo was indeed intrigued by her words. She looked down at her clothes and muttered, “I don’t look that ugly, do I?”

She was just here to make things clear. Did she need to dress up?

Zhao Zhao chuckled softly: “Mhm, mhm, mhm. Big sister looks good no matter what.”

Cen Luo hummed in reply and praised her perfunctorily: “Not as good-looking as a big star.”

Zhao Zhao was amused by this.

After a while, Cen Luo suddenly asked Zhao Zhao: “People with a tear mole should cry easily, right?”

Zhao Zhao didn’t know why Cen Luo suddenly asked this, but the person she knew with a tear mole was Jian Mu.

Although she knew Cen Luo being here must have something to do with Jian Mu, she felt a little annoyed.

But she still answered Cen Luo’s question seriously.

“Yes. A friend I know has a tear mole. She can cry instantly in acting, and she cries easily in real life too.”

Cen Luo nodded when she heard that and muttered while looking out the window: “No wonder. Then it’s not my fault.”

Zhao Zhao vaguely heard Cen Luo’s words but didn’t catch them clearly. When she asked again, Cen Luo dismissed it as nothing.

Zhao Zhao then let it go and didn’t ask again.